Abby Sams

    “if you wanted to do something absolutely honest, something true, it always turned out to be a thing that had to be done alone.” ― Richard Yates   ------------------------------------------------------   I don't remember if I've written on this before.  I have spent so much of my life imaging a future with a husband, and a family, but in the end I could end up alone. You see, there's absolutely nothing wrong with being alone, in fact I quite enjoy it. If I'm bored I can do something and not worry at all how the other feels about it. I can cook whatever I want, clean whenever I want, heck I can just lay on the floor and stare at the ceiling for hours and have no second thoughts about it. I have no problem with being alone, now or in the future. I deeply believe that either way I have the power to do immeasurable things with great force and conviction with or without someone by my side. Often times my only obstacles in this life are people, peop

    "You are never just you. Everything you do webs out to reach and connect countless people. Every person you meet is touched by you in some way." -Anonymous   ------------------------------------------------------------------- I keep forgetting what day it is so I keep missing posts. my bad.   I went to the beach this week. Nothing bad can come from going to the beach, let me just make that extra clear. The beach is one of those places that brings me life and I will never stop reminding people of that. I went to the beach, but specifically the tide pools. I am an ocean nerd, that is not new information, but the tide pools at Venice Beach were by far some of the coolest ones I've ever seen. So many different creatures in the water. Anemones, fish, algae, crabs, maybe even an urchin or two living together in this tiny pool when the entire ocean in one rock behind them.     Sitting there on a rock, in a weird position so I wouldn't step

I'm hoping if I post this here Sony won't kill me for it. All rights belong to Sony Music Entertainment "You Are Mine" - MosaicMSC

  “The scarcity of time is the reason we have to concentrate on one thing at a time.” ― Matt Perman   -----------------------------------------------------   I think I'm good at multi-tasking, but I am really not. I mean to say that while I certainly can have many things on my plate and get them all done, it causes a very strange reaction in my body. I become overwhelmed until I make myself sit down and write out everything that I am actually doing to let my brain know that it will all be okay. Even as I write this I am doing two things.     But there's always time for a metaphor or a simile so here goes... I think of the time we have in life like a dessert. It's dry and long, but there are bits of plants, animals, rocks. Most of the plants are prickly because there is something trying to rid them of their habitat. Time is a dangerous thing because the more time we have under our belt the closer we are to being rid of the earth (sorry that

  "Money won't keep folks from grieving, and it won't stop love from leaving. So here's my two cents: what's the use in making money." - Ben Rector   ------------------------------------     I think it's funny how worried everyone is about making money, myself included. I mean I understand that this society capitalizes off of everything and grows from human desire for more material things, but we can live without it. The world has become one giant materialist hell hole circling a ball of fire in the sky. Nothing has true value anymore. A photo never seems to mean as much unless it was taken with the nicest camera or the newest phone. We go to event just so we can post about them and bring home some sort of physical representation that we were actually there. If you couldn't take anything to a new country or place or bring anything back to prove you had gone, would you still go?   I deeply crave to disappear and not have to dea

"On a scale of 1-0 are you happy?" - Bo Burnham --------------------------------------------------------- Happiness is one of those terms that doesn't really having a true meaning. People have depression, people have other mental conditions, people have good days and bad days. Happiness is a relative term. Something closer to euphoric (I've been pretty partial to that word lately) and cheery would be better. That being said I'm going to talk about being happy anyway and use that word regardless. I just wanted to clear things up with the word and the connotations that follow it. Happiness, my dear friends, is quite a lovely thing because you can posses it even if you're having a crummy day. I meet new people every day and always get the question "how are you." It's common courtesy to ask that, but instead of answering with "good" or "fine," I've been answering with "happy." I am in a rut. I

“The best remedy for those who are afraid, lonely or unhappy is to go outside, somewhere where they can be quite alone with the heavens, nature and God. Because only then does one feel that all is as it should be and that God wishes to see people happy, amidst the simple beauty of nature. As longs as this exists, and it certainly always will, I know that then there will always be comfort for every sorrow, whatever the circumstances may be. And I firmly believe that nature brings solace in all troubles.” ― Anne Frank     ----------------------------------------------------- I've had a lot of time to be alone while I've been here, but also ample time with friends. I'm not sure which I enjoy more for my friends are great company but there is nothing that rejuvenates me more than being outdoors alone in the world. There's a small park near my apartment complex that truly is one of my favorite sports in this city with a close second being the parking dec

“Criticism may not be agreeable, but it is necessary. It fulfils the same function as pain in the human body; it calls attention to the development of an unhealthy state of things. If it is heeded in time, danger may be averted; if it is suppressed, a fatal distemper may develop." - Winston Churchill -------------------------------------------- People get criticized on the daily. It may be from family, friends, bosses, piers, or total strangers. The number of times some stranger has told me what I should do with my life is staggering. Either way it happens. It can really break a person down depending on how it's given and received. I'm going to go ahead and give a disclaimer that this is not going to be a post about toughening up or something along those lines. As the kids would say this is a post about "dealing with the haters." I was raised as an independent child. that doesn't mean my parents weren't around, it means they taught us

"I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're goin', and hook up with them later." -Mitch Hedberg ---------------------------------------- I recently moved to Los Angeles, California. The city of angels, the place where dreams come true...or is that Disney land? Either way, most people move out here with the intention of starting something in their life. You run into up and coming actors, singers, writers, directors, you tubers on every street corner. Heck, I met one in a Whole Foods the other day. This city is apparently full of opportunities for that sort of thing. Hollywood is here, studios and casting calls. People come here to make their dreams happen.  Then I showed up. I am simply here because I wanted a change of scenery. I have no intention of staying too long; I will certainly return, but i have other places my well worn feet have not touched yet. I am not here to pursue any passion or make my dr

“I choose not to place "DIS", in my ability.” ― Robert M. Hensel ----------- Do you know how strange it is to technically be disabled by the age of 18?   I have no idea how many of you are familiar with my story. I had chronic migraines for almost three years. I should probably say migraine. One word. I had one migraine for almost a year; it put me in and out of the hospital and I missed almost two full months of school. It was all over the place and never really diagnosed, to be honest half of the doctors thought I was lying. I had MRI's, X-rays, Ultra sounds and am now a pro at ER etiquette. When you're a sick child/teenager with an illness that isn't terminal most of the time you just get left out. I'm not saying the doctors don't try, but you become graffiti in their life. Your symptoms fill a room that is supposed to turn into a beautiful painting of your condition, but more often than not it becomes a mess of pictures,

This blog is mostly "hidden" so I feel very safe here. I can literally pour out the entire pot of bad coffee that is my thoughts and leave it here for some internet dog to lap off the floor. ---------- I'm actually going to write several posts today and just put them up at random times because I'm feeling a lot of things right now and I've already written them in my journal so now I'm going to put them on the internet in hopes someone will stumble across this archaic form of media, and find comfort and support in it. I have been on 13 different planes on in the past 4 months, I cant remember if I've said that yet, I haven't been anywhere for longer than two weeks all summer long. I haven't had a "home." Now I will always have a true home. I'm a Georgia girl born and bread and I always will be. That's where my parents are, and even though my heart is scattered in pieces all over the world my soul sits in the sub

"Clarity of vision with flexibility in the process." - unknown “Truth is not fully explosive, but purely electric. You don't blow the world up with the truth; you shock it into motion.”   - Criss Jami ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I haven't been in one place for longer than two weeks all summer. I've been on 13 different planes in the past three and half months. I have made plans, but they never go exactly how I thought they would. That's okay. The plan has always been: go to school, go to college, get a job, husband, kids. That was it. The past six months has taught me anything it's that life is ever changing. I developed severe joint problems, suffered side effects of the medication, recovered from chronic migraines, and decided I wanted to do more with my life.  I decided to take a semester off, something severely frowned upon in todays society

    “Show me a man with a tattoo and I'll show you a man with an interesting past.”    - Jack London --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------                I've done something. Two things really. Tattoos, my friends, are my favorite things. They are one of my favorite conversation starters and story-tellers.   Number One:    It's very simple and will most likely be filled in sometime in the future, but for now this outline of Tanzania sits on my left forearm and a reminder to me of the place I love.     Number Two:   "Future gardens from all this rain, future flowers from present pain" The childhood cancer ribbon is so important to me. I've lost two friends to the disease and have several who are currently fighting it or finally beat the beast. This tattoo has been almost 2 years in the making. Between concept art, quote font, final ar

      "The only man I envy is the man who has never been to Africa, for he has much to look forward to" Richard Mullen  -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------                   Friends,                    Here we are again, my favorite time of the year. The months before Africa. If you've seen my blog before you know that Africa has a very large portion of my heart. Tanzania to be specific. Last year was my first time away from home in a foreign country, but home is exactly where I was. The minute I stepped off that plane on to the tarmac of Kilimanjaro Airport I just knew. The smell, the air, the welcome arms of the people I would soon consider family all created this intense connection. I would be lying if I said there was never a moment I didn't feel at home, but only once did I get this feeling and it never came again.                   Karanse, Tanzania, Afric

  Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change. James 1:17 ---------------------------------   Welcome to 2016!! So here's my new year post and what not. I don't party, not a big fan of it, but I did have a wonderful New Year's Eve with friends. We made cheese bombs and talked so much we almost missed the countdown. Something I stopped doing last year was making resolutions. I really didn't like the idea of putting everything I wanted to change about myself into an all of the sudden thing. Change happens over a period of time, it's the same reason people don't quit smoking cold turkey. People don't change over night, they just don't. Leaves don't change overnight, it's a beautiful process that captures our attention.     I also hated making resolutions because it suggested that the first of January was the only day I could eve